Monday, November 22, 2010

Retired Descriptions Part 1

Since my embroidery machine gave me issues last week, I had to remove those items from my shop that needed the machine's services. Now that I have it back, I'm taking the chance to combine listings. I mean, I love my little girl and think she's fabulous, but my shop has been overtaken by adorable baby items.

The first to get condensed are the Statosaur onesies. Instead of 5 separate listings, they have been combined in to one listing where you choose the statosaur.

Here are the old descriptions and front picture for memories.

Stegonormalus Onesie

When the wonderful worlds of statistics and dinosaurs combine the result is statosaurs.

This statosaur is a stegonormalus, the combination of a stegosaurus and a normal distribution, and he is ready to do two things. First, make something (like a baby) look cute. And second, make something (like that same baby) look smart. How can you go wrong when you're making babies look cute and smart?!

Chiceratops Onesie

The land of statosaurs is full of beasts that are terribly cute and amazing statistical. How can you beat that? You can't, not even with a slide rule.

What is one to do then?

Join them. Join the land of statosaurs starting at a young age, as a baby, with a body suit.

t Rex Onesie

Tyrannosaurus Rex means “Just look at the size of his teeth! Lizard” in Greek. In this onesie it is paired with the t-distribution or “King of Distributions” (self-titled, Erlang took out a trademark on the phrase a week before the t-distribution was published). Marriage made in heaven, or in the Cretaceous Period? Consider:

Tyrannosaurus is mean and ate animals to get larger. The t-distribution “eats” degrees of freedom and gains mass around the mean.

The number of Tyrannosaurus alive today has a mean and mode of 0, looking at data over the last couple of decades. This too is the mean and mode of the (standard) t-distribution.

And the most chilling “coincidence”: The t-distribution was first published by William Gosset, who went to college at Oxford - there is a skeleton of a Tyrannosaurs at the Oxford Museum of Natural History.

With these cold hard facts it is no wonder statisticians are calling the t-distribution the t-rex of the univariate distributions. While paleontologists are quite often overheard saying that the t-distribution might in fact be the inspiration the t-rex was modeled after.

Brachiolognormalus Onesie

According to Sir Wikipeadia, brachiosaurus means “arm lizard”. And the log normal distribution could be described as an “arm distribution” since it is so skewed. Come with me, arm in arm, as I take you on a journey to meet a wonderful new statosaur, but please don’t be alarmed. Now throw your arms in the air and give it up for brachiolognormalus!

Get your baby an arm above the rest with this cute bodysuit. But don’t feel strong-armed into buying this, just take a look at it, how can anyone resist a statdino with such charm? But that doesn’t mean that I won’t twist your arm (despite what that does to my karma) to buy not one, but an army of this cloth armor for the baby which you can’t help to wrap with amore (that is Italian for love it like an arm).

And to top it all off it doesn’t even cost an arm and a leg.

Unidactyl Onesie

Log 8:00am: I have climbed the highest plateau near the ridge and have been surprised to find three Uniform distributions laying in a nest. I will take one back to basecamp to examine closer.

Log 10:15am: After placing the Uniform distribution under the heat lamp it started to move. I was going to leave camp to fill my water jugs at the stream, but I will wait to watch the distribution some more.

Log 11:30am: The Uniform distribution has hatched and inside of it was a winged like dinosaur that still carries shape of the Uniform distribution. I shall call it the Unidactyl.

Log 11:45am: Egad! I am under attack from a huge Unidactyl! I can only assume that this is the mother of the small Unidactyl I have found. I fear I will not survive this attack, especially since I am writing in my log book instead of fending it off.

Log 2:15pm: After a hard fight I was able to escape the domain of the Unidactyl by running past point B. Even though there is theoretical support for the Unidactyl past this point is seems that she can not go beyond this limit. I have decided to commemorate this great day by embroidering a Unidactly on baby onesies, for that shall forever insure my place in history.